Your Butt (And Why It’s Not Special)

Maybe when you were growing up, your mom told you that you were special and unique, and that there’s “no one else like you”. That might be true, but the same can’t be said for your butt.

Stay with me here.

Every once in a while I skim through the health/fitness board on Pinterest just to see what’s out there (it’s usually not good). Yesterday was no different. I came across a post that was tagged as being a “workout for your butt type”. I wish I were kidding.

A workout for your butt type? Really? Let’s look at this from a strictly anatomical standpoint. We all have butts. Some are flat, some are round, some are perky, and some are a bit.. um.. jiggly. No matter what “type” of butt you have, or what shape you think it is, the fact remains the same that your butt is made up of the following: your posterior pelvis covered by glute and hip musculature, all underneath layers of adipose tissue (fat) and finally your skin. There are no butt “types”, there are simply different shapes based on your proportions of each of those tissue types, and your genetics of course.  Wide set pelvis? Wider hips, and thus, wider butt. Strong, built gluteal muscles? More than likely you have a full, rounded butt. Small, weak glutes with a substantial layer of body fat? Well, that’ll run the spectrum from flat to round (with or without jiggle).

My point is, your butt is not unique. You do not have a butt-type. You do not need specific “toning” exercises that will fit your type and make your special butt look better than the girl next door. You know what will make your butt look better than the next girl (or guy)? Squats, hip thrusters, barbell glute bridges, barbell lunges, deadlifts, etc. etc. The list goes on and on, but the basic premise is this: strengthening and building your glutes using the basic compound exercises is what is going to change the look of your butt. You know what’s going to happen in the process of strengthening your glutes? You’ll lose some of that body fat that’s covering your backside (if that’s your goal). Heck, maybe you want that thing bigger than the moon. Or Nicki Minaj’s derriere.

big butts

The article that the pin linked to was just as ridiculous as you think it sounds. I’m not kidding when I say that they suggest sumo squats for “saggy” butts, prone leg circles for “double butt” (really? That’s a type? I just thought that meant your undies were too tight), curtsy lunges for “big” butts, some sort of strange jump squats for “flat” butts, and so on.

After I face palmed myself into next Tuesday, I couldn’t believe what I was reading. What made it worse though, was knowing that many women will believe articles like this when they read them. “Ooh, I’ve got a big butt! I MUST do these curtsy lunges, the internet says it will help with my big-butted problem!”  My first issue with this are the ridiculous butt types. Can’t we come up with a better adjective than big? Say, I don’t know, luxurious? And who was it that decided that a big butt is a problem that needs to be fixed? Heck, my girl Tara just facebook-bragged a couple of days ago about splitting her jeans because she has built up her glutes so much. (Go girl!!) My other issue with this is the shear hilarity of one specific body weight move helping to fix your “problematic” butt type.

Here’s what women need to understand: fitness does not need to be complicated at all. Yes, we all have different body types, limb lengths, body fat percentages, and so on, but on a basic level we’re all the same. We all have a bone structure that is the basis of the human form. We all have a very similar musculoskeletal system that moves our bones on a system of levers and pulleys, helping us to perform every day tasks. Yes, we all have very unique genetics, but those genetics don’t mean that you need to be doing plie squats or curtsy lunges while your best friend needs to be climbing stairs. Your genetics may determine how fast you build muscle mass or where on your body you hold most of your body fat, but it won’t determine which body weight exercises will be the magical cure to getting you the shape you so desperately want.

The truth is, all of this genetic detail matters very little in the overall fitness world. Use the tried and true exercises that have been around for ages (squat, deadlift, bench, row, and all of their variations). Add in some other accessory exercises to support the compound lifts. Whether your butt is flat, round, or somewhere in between, a barbell hip thrust will do you wonders. Your butt is not special, not when it comes to training. As long as you have all of the anatomical building blocks, you can build a better backside, if that’s what you really want to do. Your “type” does not determine which exercises will work. Science does. 

giraffe butt

Get After It

I don’t care what you did this weekend.

I don’t care if you ate too much or worked out too little.

I don’t care if you slept all day because you stayed up all night watching a Game of Thrones marathon.

Honey-Badger-Dont-Care

All I care about is that you get after it today! I don’t care how much damage you think you did to your diet or your training over the weekend, because you know what? It’s only a couple of days, and it’s in the past. And let’s be real, you probably didn’t make that much of a dent in your training progress in one weekend. But you will, if you don’t get after it today.

Get back on track.

The only thing that will derail your training is wallowing in your guilt over how much you enjoyed your weekend. The only thing that won’t? Making yourself get up and get moving. Today.

Remember and enjoy your indulgences, but put them in the past and move on to what’s really important:  Being a better you. (Can you imagine if you were just a little bit better each day, how amazingly awesome you would be a year from now? 10 years from now? 50 years? Seriously. Think about it. Be better every day.)

Bebetter

Do you know what I did this weekend?

On Saturday night I went to an amazing japanese noodle bar in Portland, ME. I ate a big bowl of house made noodles, and then had some cocktails. I followed that up with a big bowl of gelato at 11 pm, and an indulgent brunch the following morning.

Good for my training and nutrition goals? Nope. Worth it? Every bite, every drop. And I wouldn’t take it back for a second. (Especially my bloody mary at brunch. Hot damn that was good). Because today I’m going to get in the weight room and get after it. In order to make good progress, every weekend can’t be filled with endless indulgences, but having a weekend like this every once in a while will set you back less than you think. And besides, it just gives you a little kick in the pants and more motivation for some hard work in the coming week right?

Do something

Let’s Go! Start this week off right? How are you getting closer to your goals today?

Rules of the Weight Room

The weight room is a pretty incredible place, a place that is filled with strength, determination, and PRs.

But it’s also often full of douchey people.

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Unfortunately, this is a fact of life. But maybe all of those douchey people don’t realize what they’re doing, maybe they don’t know any better. Maybe they just need a set of rules like we all had posted on the wall in our 3rd grade classrooms.

So here is my list, my seven rules of the weight room. And these rules are not meant to be broken. Even if you can bench press your girlfriend and her two best friends in pyramid formation.

1. Wash your clothing. Especially dry fit.  Workout clothes stink. Dry fit clothes stink even more. Even if you think you didn’t get sweaty, that dry-fit shirt you’re wearing absorbed some of the sweat that you think magically never appeared. And even if you think your own home-grown scent isn’t that bad, multiply it by 10 and that’s what other people smell. Add in the constant movement that causes your scent to waft, and often close quarters of a weight room, and you’ve got yourself a recipe for body-odor-smog. Air pollution at it’s most offensive.

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2. No Selfies. Ever. STOP STANDING IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR AND TAKING SELFIES WITH YOUR PHONE. Stop. Just stop. For the love of God, stop.

3. Stick to one rack at a time. I know you really think that you need to be super-setting your quarter squats with your bench press, bro, but if you work out in a gym that only has 3 power racks, and you’re taking up 2 of them for 45 minutes, that’s not really fair now is it? Unless you’re one of only a couple people lifting, don’t act like you’re entitled to hog everything just because your biceps are big. And if you absolutely must be using both racks, don’t give me a death stare when I ask to work in for sets on one of them.

LiftingRules14. Clean Up Your Mess.  After you’re done getting your pump on, don’t leave a loaded barbell for the next person to clean off. No, it’s not because I can’t lift the plates myself, it’s because I don’t like cleaning up after sweaty, smelly strangers. And on a related note, please, please, please: if you do see me clearing plates off a barbell, don’t rush over, push me out of the way, and do it for me. You think you’re being a gentleman, I think you’re being sexist. I can move the plates by myself, thank you very much. 

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5. No Gabbing With Your Bestie On The Phone. The weight room certainly doesn’t have to be silent, and conversations between gym goers happen frequently. But when I’m trying to bust out a set of dead lifts and you’ve just parked your ass on a bench, holding a set of 3 lb dumbbells that you aren’t even using because you’re too busy on your phone, you’re distracting me and taking me out of my groove. I don’t need to hear about how drunk you got last night or what time you’re going to go tanning lately. I don’t care. Please shut up.

6. If you sweat, wipe it up. There is nothing more gross than mysterious sweat droplets that have been left on a bench to fester. There is no shame in sweating, so if you are the perpetrator, leaving it behind and pretending you “didn’t do it” is just plain disgusting. You wouldn’t leave other bodily fluids laying around would you? Sweat is no different. And if you would leave other bodily fluids laying around, maybe you have no business being out in public anyway.

7. Don’t spread out like you’re in your living room. I’ve seen people come into the weight room, drop their sweatshirt on one bench, their keys and water bottle on another, and then set up in the squat rack.  For others who come in after you, seeing gear on a bench gives the impression that someone is using it. Be considerate, and keep your belongings with you, or leave them in the locker room.  Douche.

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You tell ‘em, Pauly. 

What is your biggest weight room rule? What is your biggest gym pet peeve?

Boston Marathon 2013: A Letter To The Runners

***EDIT: The following post was written and posted the morning before the tragic Boston Marathon bombing. My heart goes out to all those affected, and to all of those whose lives were turned upside down for one senseless act of violence. Stay Strong, Boston.***

 

Today is one of the best days of the year in Boston; Marathon Monday. Instead of a normal blog post, I’ve taken today to write a letter to all of the runners who will be pounding the pavement today:

marathon

Dear Marathon Runners,

Do you know what you’re about to do? You’re about to run. 26.2 miles.

From Hopkinton to Boylston St, through Framingham, Wellesley, Newton, and Brookline, among other towns in between. Past throngs of screaming students from Wellesley College, BC, BU, and the 30something other colleges in the Boston Area (because of course all of the colleges have this day off, it’s “Patriots Day”). Up Heartbreak Hill, where you’ll want to just crawl your way to the top (or alternatively, curl up in the fetal position and cry… both are acceptable). You’ll run through some quieter areas, but for the most part the crowds will be so loud and excited that, for better or worse, you’ll hardly be able to hear yourself think. You’re about to run.

You’re about to join the exclusive club of people who have run Boston. BOSTON. The world’s oldest annual marathon, and one that is the pinnacle of many runners’ careers. Runners from all over the US and all over the world dream of running in this race, and here you are. You are HERE. You are about to run.  You are becoming a part of history; a part of a century-old tradition, and this is happening NOW.

And I’ll be somewhere in Mile 25 eating handing out Swedish Fish to those who need a little glucose kick (and maybe throwing back a mimosa or two). And for that, that makes you better than me (for today). You have trained your butt off, you have logged countless miles throughout a long, cold winter in order to get ready for today. You have dedicated your weekends to long runs and your social life has taken a back seat to the pavement. For that, I applaud you. Whether you’re an elite, a weekend warrior, a war veteran, running for a charity or simply to put a check check-mark on your bucket list, know that today you are amazing.

As much as I joke on this blog about how much I hate running, I have the utmost respect for all of you. The reality of the situation is, I couldn’t do what you’re doing today. The time, the commitment, the training sessions, the final event; I know it’s not in the cards for me. But you’re about to complete one of the most incredible tasks of your lives. I applaud you for everything that has brought you to this moment, and I will continue my applause all day, from the sidelines, because not everyone has a marathon in them. YOU do.

You are strong, you are determined. You may be fast, you may be slow, but all that matters is that you’re here, and you’re about to run.

And to my friends Kristen, Steph, and Corey who are running today, this message goes out to you three especially. Good luck on the course, have fun, and most importantly, keep an eye out for me at Mile 25. I’ll give you Swedish Fish. And maybe a mimosa if you ask politely. ;)

You can also check out my Marathon Monday post from last year if you’d like, complete with some thoughts about the inspirational men and women who run this race every year. Enjoy! Happy Marathon Monday everyone! 

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Reader Question: Do I Need A Recovery Day?

I often get questions from people about taking time off: how do you know when you need rest and how much recovery time is necessary? I got one such question from a reader (but more importantly, a very good friend of mine), and although I gave her a quick answer at the time, I thought this really deserved a little bit more attention! Her question was this:

Question on recovery time- how much of it is needed and when should I push through? Legs feel heavy, but don’t know if I am being a baby and should push through. For example:

Mon- off 
Tues- 90 min hot yoga 
Wed- 90 min hot yoga, 60 min elliptical
Thurs- 5 mile run
Fri- 90 min hot yoga 
Sat-…. to be determined. 

Thoughts fit friend?  - Missy 

My first response to Missy was of course if she would consider trading in some of that elliptical time for some weight room time. Unfortunately, that was a no-go, but I’ll keep trying to convince her ;)

No matter what your training regimen though, I think the key phrase here comes at the end of her question. “Legs feel heavy…”

When you’ve been training intensively for 4 days in a row, it’s no wonder your legs feel heavy! Let’s break it down into time spent training — never mind the type of exercise. In the past four days, she had worked out for anywhere from 45 minutes to 150 minutes every single day. Only one day was as low as 45 minutes, but that was at least 45 minutes of continuous impact from running (This is just an estimate, I have no idea how fast she runs 5 miles). All of the other days included at least 90 minutes of training, one of those followed by 60 minutes of elliptical time.

Now, overall, I do not think she had done too much that week, so I’m not concerned that she has overdone it. I would just recommend that the following day be a “rest” day, where rest can mean one of two things:

1. Complete rest. Just going about your normal daily activities, not worrying about physical activity, and nurturing your muscles with healthy food to fuel your recovery.

rest day funnyAhh yes… total rest. Win! 

2. Active recovery: Light exercise (walking), foam rolling, mobility drills, etc.

But I would not recommend any heavy exercise on this 5th day. There are many people out there who do train 5 (or 6, or even 7) days in a row, and if you’re feeling great and have not been doing heavy lifting, intensive plyos, or high mileage for those first 4 days, than adding in a light exercise day on the 5th day is more than acceptable. If one or two of these days had been upper body intensive, it could be a different story all together as well. However, Missy had done 4 days of leg-intensive activity and was well aware that her legs were feeling “heavy”, which to me is code for “my legs were screaming for a day off”.

Training weeks should be broken up so that you can maximize your performance in each session. If you were to have two heavy-lifting lower body days, and complete them back to back, there is no way your body would be recovered enough for the second session. This can increase your chance of injury as well as decrease the efficacy of your training sessions.

I know that there are people out there who feel otherwise, but I do not recommend intensive training for one area of your body for more than 3 days in a row. Even for runners, 3 days followed by an off (or very light cross training day) is generally my recommendation. And for heavy lifters, the breakdown of work vs. rest needs to be followed even more carefully.

In her question, Missy did not include any heavy lifting days, but I know that many of my readers combine both power yoga and lifting into their weekly workout calendars. Here is an example of my typical training week, so that you can see the rest time that I build in for myself:

Sunday: Light conditioning work, or Yoga in the summer. Usually a light, low speed stadium workout.

Monday: Lower body lift day (Squat focus)

Tuesday: Upper body lift day (Bench press for compound lift)

Wednesday: Conditioning day. Intense stadium workout

Thursday: Off

Friday: Lower body lift day. (Deadlift focus)

Saturday: Off

Many weeks I’ll switch out Sunday’s light conditioning for a second upper body (bench/row) day, or I’ll take Sunday completely off and use Thursday for my second upper body day. On weeks like this when I’m only going to have 3 lifting days, I’ll add in some pull ups/push ups to my lower body days to turn them into more of a full body session.  But you’ll see that I’m never doing more than three days of lower-body-intensive work at a time. While Sunday is a lighter day, it still stresses my lower body muscles enough that giving my legs/glutes some rest time on Tuesday is very important, especially if I want to perform well in my conditioning day on Wednesday.

That’s it for meow. Stay tuned for an upcoming post about why adequate recovery time is so important!

How many days do you train per week? Do you take your rest days in succession or split them up throughout the week? Do you ever push through a session even though you feel like you need a rest day?